Break time… can I do better?

Just thinking about all the time I waste reading reviews etc… someone else telling me what’s cool and what I should be into. Like for example. How many times do I have to read about Green Day not being punk for this and that reason. They write great music. I kinda got burnt out during the “Dookie” lp. I had it on rare brown wax and I sold it because I did not want to hear those songs repeated anymore. I had had enough. That being said it is a fine record. So good it got played too much. They made more records, and I can say there is not a bad one in all of their catalog. Does that make Billie Joe the new John Lennon? Hardly, listen to what he’s saying. It’s still the call of punk energy. Then there is all the money they have. Who cares. The proof is in good songs and they know how to make them and sometimes it distracts me enough from what I am doing to pick up a wooden chair and sing along.

Can you do that? Make someone want to do what you are doing? Then it must be good. Who cares what they call it. You like it and thats that. Here’s another one… “It’s not the original guys in the band”…. like Kiss for example. They all got old. No crime in that. When I saw the original line up on the farewell tour Peter looked so tired I felt bad for him. He was not bad and did the job, but you could see he looked spent. He hit the drums real light and hit some clams. As for Ace he was late getting there being flown in at the last minute and he himself said he did not really want a Kiss reunion, and he mostly did it for the fans. So down go two originals. Replaced by younger guys with more energy. In my opinion they play the Kiss songs so well they make it look easy. Why? Because they have not played it for the millionth time and they are still young. that brings energy to the guys who need it most, Gene and Paul.

I would go see Ace on his own. Peter on his own. Kiss on their own. They put the reunion to rest. It was fun. Glad I got to see it. It would be like a monkey’s paw to do it a second time. Here’s where I am going with all of this… can you do it better? Would you kick out someone if they truly did not want to be part of what you are doing? Ace has said the makeup had a bad affect on his skin, but he still slapped it on to make us all happy, and yes he got paid for it. What about the great bands that didn’t get paid? I don’t have all the answers. Pat Smear did not get paid for many years, then he did. Good for Pat. Maybe you have not been paid in a while. Maybe your day is coming. it could be just around the corner…. or maybe not. Let’s hope it is. Did you do your best with today? I did.

Rock and Roll saved my soul?

I don’t know why I want to have a rock band. I suppose because it looks fun (and is fun…) but I have tried to get something going for 30 years. I blame the art. Art is my main focus in life and always has been since I was a kid. Music was always more of a challenge, but just about anybody can do it (just like art…) I kind of got my toes wet in the music thing this week, and the guys I am jamming with are very cool to me. I made some mistakes, but we played through and in small steps we put together 2 song ideas and recorded them to save them.

I set out to make this happen because I want to live everyday to the fullest I can. The last few years I have been doing all the things I wanted to before, but never got to for some reason or another. The music lessons I take have helped my memory and helped with my confidence. I started out wanting things to happen all at once, but things take time if you really want them. The ultimate goal for me is to have more energy and get healthier by dropping weight, but slowly. I lost it too fast before and was not ready to deal with the results. This time I am working at the very reason I am unhealthy in the first place… depression. As silly as it sounds I give myself daily affirmations and tell myself I am a worthy and deserving guy and that it’s o.k. to have a good day and have fun.  It’s not always easy, but I am making small changes.

So for me monday was a milestone in a way. I have many plans for this year. If you want to track the progress of my band click here to the blog page: Pudding Cupps

If I can make it happen anyone can. Take your time. You will get there before you know it.

Lots of love to you all, Scott

Two thousand twelve, take 3….

Sure as hell can't afford this anytime soon... but it looks nice...

Can’t seem to get this year started. Trying to find work and just coming up short. Most of my art pals don’t include me in shows or have moved on to day jobs. Not like art is selling right now anyway. Trying to work out a new style, but it’s like swimming against the current. Trying more just to stay focused and work hard. Practicing guitar for sanity and eating better too. Trying to get myself in better condition all together but this boat is leaking and just might sink. Trying to stay inspired and move forward.

So, I’ll try this year again… for the third time… I’ll get out and walk some. I’ll eat better. I’ll try harder to stay in the zone. I’ll put the work in. I know the world does not owe me, but is this it? Is this as far as it goes? Maybe it’s just the rainy day today. Maybe I’ll be smiling tomorrow. “Wish in one hand” so they say…

The Decline… and a New Day Rising

I always felt kind of outside of things being an artist and kid who daydreamed all day in class. I was different. Not special or more different than most, but until I discovered the punk movement I felt stranded in in own room at home. Me and my drawings and fm radio at first. Then KISS and any hard rock I could find, but most hard rockers had set things and certain beliefs you had to go with. Like you need long hair. Like to get stoned. You got to hate disco… things that fit the formula of the genre. My uncle Don had listened to punk before it was called that. he seemed to have an open mind for things that were different like Bowie, The Stooges, Ramones I knew them from magazines I bought for kiss articles like Creem and Circus. Don and my Aunt Liz helped run Back Door Man fanzine. The first of it’s kind in L.A. . Don had a great big record collection with all kinds of punk and new wave 45 art to inspire my hunger for something new. Slowly I started to listen to not only the music, but what he had to say. He taught me how to mow lawns and do household things and at the end of the week we organized his 45′s alphabetically and at thee same time played anything that looked interesting.

I loved the sleeves with Gary Panter art on them. Ray Pettibon was a favorite artist with the punks at school and you could find his flyers at the local record shops and literally in the gutters of redondo beach. Art was part of punk and I wanted in. So with an open mind and an armload of borrowed records by The New york dolls, Stooges Raw Power, and the Chambers brothers “Time has come”lp I dove off the deep end about mid 1979.

In junior high we had a small group that was hip to “Never Mind the Bollocks”. We played it on those small Sanyo cassette recorders. The kind Mike Brady took notes on. We went to Licorice Pizza for punk at first. They had new wave buttons and fanzines too. The most amazing part of it all would be a movie called the “Decline of Western Civilization”. I went to see our local premier at midnight on the corner of crenshaw and P.C.H. in Torrance, CA.

I went with my friend Kevin who was terrified of real punks. I had shaved my head recently, and he was worried because his hair was long and there were punks cutting off a new romantic’s hair with battery powered clippers out side before the show. (We were both kind of shocked by it.) I thought to myself, “It’s only a movie…” but I was wrong. It was a documentary that would shape possibly my remaining days. I was not the only one. All across the globe this movie was the template for what would get termed “Hardcore Punk”.

The movie did not really get to show the art side of the movement. A mentor punk we knew said you had to change your look each week or you were a “Trendy”. What the film did show was young aggression in full bloom. In those days shows did not happen because  the police broke them up, but now there was a movie we had to show what we felt. They showed it to all the parents at an event called “parents of punkers” punk was dealt with as an epidemic by most of our Regan loving parents. I watched it with my Grandfather who got upset about Eugene’s comment about, “the ugly old people…” I explained that lots of the movement’s cause was to provide a sense of shock, and it was o.k. not to agree with all of it’s ideals. The main thing was to keep an open mind. My grandparents and my family watched on. They knew that I was on this path. I had taken a stand. Right or wrong.

All my friends memorized the dialog until we all agreed to not repeat it anymore. We watched my tape from HBO over and over. Years passed. More Decline movies were made (part 2 and 3) but they are still not available due to legal reasons. The kids still watch it today. It was our “Woodstock” of sorts.

Today we face even rougher times. We are all grown, and wonder about what kind of future we have (just like then) What kind of future our kids will have (many of my friends have punk rock kids). I still feel the same. I still feel punk has a place in this world for people looking to find their “outsider peers”. I am told there is missing footage of bands shot for the film like the Dickies and (at the time Red Cross) Redd Kross. Maybe one day we will get to see this too. Of course you all know bands like Green Day now and probably know someone with blue hair at your school (and schools allow blue hair now for the most part) You don’t get beat down just for dressing punk anymore.  (people used to yell, “Fuck you, devo!” at us) It’s all part of the daily routine now. The 90′s follow up to the decline may have been Dave Markey’s “The Year Punk Broke” but today’s kids don’t really identify with grunge (see 90′s for more on grunge…)

We are all Devo and still in decline. In the words of Zippy, “Are we having FUN yet?” All that’s left are hospitals, schools, donut shops and nail salons (see my next art show at a nail salon near you…) Thank you Penelope!

2012! Hello new year! I am ready for a good year ahead…

This year has to be good. Times have been rough lately and a change has to come soon. 2 years ago we lost my grandma, last year was Sharon’s aunt, and this year was Sharon’s aunt Marge. My sister is recovering from her sickness thank god for that. I hope to re-charge somewhat this year. Some of my drive and motivation has been lacking lately and I need to get this year moving ahead on the right path. Stop talking and start doing. Get back to bettering my health. Work harder, but know when to take time for the small things and not let life pass me by.

I have been writing songs in my composition books and in the next few weeks we start jamming some on them. Have not had a guitar lesson for a few weeks due to the holidays and today I will get practicing for their return. I have a new direction of sorts for my art and paintings and I hope the next comic book I have planned should be bigger and way better than the last two. I plan on drumming up new local business by going around town and getting the word out about my art skills with some new ad materials. New shirts are going to be developed soon too. I had a few requests for the “Search and Enjoy” shirts at my website, so that’s getting the green light to get produced soon. Sold a few paintings this week too. Waiting for payments from a few commissions I did too. 2012 is off to a good start. this could be a great year.

I am still waiting for the new KISS album”Monster”, but I’m betting we won’t hear more on it until June or so… The way over due Kissology vol.4 too. It’s getting to the point I don’t care anymore. You would think we get to see the cover by now at least. Mike watt has a new “Spielgusher” thing out I want to get. I don’t think we will get the new Redd Kross anytime soon either. Oh well, It’s only entertainment. Have not bought many art books this year, but I did buy some comic books (well, I got a few subscriptions to some because it’s cheaper) right now I get Green Lantern and Batman. I kind of switched from Marvel to DC. I was getting the Hulk for a bit, but I had to cut it and just keep two titles for now.

As for movies, I hope to see the new Ghost Rider soon. The first one is a real good popcorn movie, and this new one looks even better. Most of all it looks like a fun movie to see. I have not seen Xmen first class, Thor or Capt. Amer., yet either, but I’m sure I will soon. Maybe I’ll get them on used dvd or something. The Avengers may be good, but the trailer looks boring. The next Batman should be worthy of checking out too.  The best thing about the movies is the popcorn too. I got to spend some time recently with my sister. We went to the Muppets and had a big thing of corn and soda. It was fun.

Sharon and I plan to have some “reading dates” out on our patio the next few sundays (weather permitting that is) I have a big stack of comics to catch up on and I bought the graphic novel for the blackest night series. I also have a big Simon/Kirby book to read as well. I also want to get to the keith Richards bio too. I read Ace Frehley’s in one sunday. It was kind of sad that he spent so long on drugs and never really enjoyed life. He seems happier now (I hope that’s true). I did spot a new DC book on the art of Alex Ross (not the happy trees guy… the comic book guy) but I really am trying to enjoy what I already have and I have an Alex ross sketchbook book, so maybe I’ll just re-discover that for now.

As for toys I just don’t have any room left for them, but I still got a small Darth Vader guy and some hot wheels (an orange drag merc, a swat car, and a ford purple with flames delivery truck) this year from santa anyway. I’m sure I’ll by a few hot wheels here and there. I’m sure we’ll hit the torrance flea too (wallet permitting) We’ll see….

Got a friend coming by to buy some paintings now, so I got to hit the showers and get clean. Have a great new year!

Wacka, Wacka!

I went to the Muppets new movie with my sister who has been sick, but is on the mend now. We have not been able to see each other for some time as she moved to the bay area some time ago. As kids we were bored quite often as we lived a long way from the mall and the only other place we could go was a 3 mile walk to 7-11 to get lemonheads, slurpees and my favorite, star wars gum cards. (That was if we had some change) Otherwise we had cable TV. I thought the cable company forgot to turn off our service, but it turns out mom kept paying for it for us (probably to keep us at home). My sister watched her favorite movies over and over. I remember Devo videos shown there way before mtv and concerts by neil young (live rust era) and Alice Cooper. I had a small black and white portable in my room with cable and late at night I would smoke cloves and watch a Clockwork Orange and The rock and roll swindle (on school nights too!) Well, they showed the original Muppet Movie all the time. Just before the family split up then we often watched the Muppet Show at dinner time followed by Benny Hill.

That was years ago. We all got older. The 80′s seemed to fly by like childhood years do, and The Muppets got stored away until now. You are either a fan or not, and Jenny and I went clear back to when Kermit the frog still lived on Sesame Street. I have always said the best song ever made was Minah, Minah by the muppets and I stand by that. No real words just plain old jerky emotion being laid down by some angry puppets. It was a radio hit too. Great tune. Just like Surfin’ Bird by the Trashmen or Wild Thing pure rock and roll excellence. Then there was Blondie, Alice Cooper and many others that appeared on the Muppet show…. but that was long ago. My sister got sick this year and since she is on the mend she decided to come to visit the family. I had not been to the movies in a long time and Jenny had sent me some old video clips on facebook of the Muppet band from the original movie. So we made a plan to check the new movie out.

I am so glad she is doing better and just to spend a day with her was as great of a christmas present as I could get this year. She’s my younger sister and she is supposed to out live me. That’s just how it’s supposed to in my mind. She has just found her new family and new life in the bay area and she deserves a long life of happiness. Getting back to the movie… it was just like you think a muppet movie would be. The nice thing was no bad CGI effects. You could just enjoy the good words and messages the muppets have for you (and you know what they are…) things like it’s going to be o.k. as long as I got you and that’s just how Jenny and I felt watching it and having some popcorn. Even enjoyed the heckeling of the commercials by the nerds in the crowd. (I am a nerd myself, so it’s good to see people let go and just have fun for 2 hours) This world is so uptight and like Robert Plant said, “does anyone remember laughter?” I always have laughed at the Muppets. The Rainbow Connection song always makes me cry too, just does… so does “Being Green” so there you have it. Get out a good cry. Have a laugh. We all need to sometimes. The spoiler for me was the fact that Walter the muppet’s real life persona turns out to be Sheldon Cooper from the Big Bang Theory (My wife Sharon’s favorite TV show) (check out the man or muppet video attached) As for my sister, can you imagine if you had a fan to cheer you on your whole life and give you endless support and unconditional love? Well that’s how my sister is for me. She can be stubborn at times, but she has so much love to give it’s amazing, so I had a real good day. Jenny did too. Until next time, Minah, minah and Wacka, wacka!

1978, A magic year for me.

1978. Kiss had released the solo albums and all the kids picked which Kiss member they liked best. I bought Ace’s lp and got paul and peter’s as gifts. I did buy gene’s but I gave it to Barbra H. for inviting me to her birthday party. (she also got the Car’s first lp which we played all day). Our family had sold our home and we would be moving to “the Hill” a richer neighborhood (and a 2 story house we would fix up). We were leaving behind my roots. My hometown I grew up in. I was 11 years old.

I had to adjust to our new home. Everything was far away. Before I could ride my bike or skateboard to the store or friends house, but this was not my old beach town. Kids outcast me for not growing up there and I found myself amongst the outsider’s crowd. We listened to cassette tapes at lunch. Mainly the Sex Pistols, Nevermind the Bollocks. We also watched saturday night live and memorized movies like Airplane and Caddyshack. The Stones’ Some girls was the lp of that year for us. Mick and Dan Ackroyd goofed on Tom Snyder on SNL. The Stones played live. It was a great dirty lp. The cover was changed due to using Lucy and other celebs on the first run. It was great all the was through. My uncle was a huge fan who also would introduce me to punk and new wave soon. This was when I became me. My parents fought out the last of their marriage behind closed doors. The new big house became cold and the rooms all seemed to separate us from communication. Still my sister and I were close as there was no place to go and we just had each other to try and sort out the oncoming storm of the divorce.

I often go back to 1978. I collect things from then and prior to that trying to remember it was not always dysfunction. We did have a family once. At least we tried to have one. Sometimes things need change sooner than later. 1978 was the start of the end of the 70′s and I became a young man. I became really aware my future was in my hands. I would have to figure out how to get down stream alone and I had no feelings of self worth to speak of. I would battle depression for many years to come. This was the turning point 1978. For 1979 and 1980 I sat in my room playing Paul Stanley’s sappy solo lp about loss and ending relationships. I also played the first Pretender’s lp. The song “kid” was a favorite of my mom’s then and always takes me back to then. I would sometimes walk to the 7-11 to buy Star Wars cards if I had some change. Soon I would move back to Redondo with my dad and start smoking things, but before then I had 1978. The final year I was still just a kid.